Esther Vilar - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia I put this in serious discussion for an obvious reason: this could turn into a very big (if not nasty) debate. As I was reading through this article, I realized that I do not disagree with anything that I have read. Particularly right here: Because it's true. Women are grown up and taught to be sexually reclusive. But at the same time, those that aren't, are branded as sluts and treated as outcasts. The prime example of a double-edged sword. Now, I'm not sure I quite agree here, because in this day and age (granted, this book was written in 1971 so this point is probably invalid), women are becoming more and more the doter, rather than the dotee. But at the same time, it's still a little weird for women to approach a man, to initiate the date, and initiate more intimate contact, but not due to women's control over them. This is more so seen out of pride (though I don't have anything to back up other than personal experience) rather than because women have trained men to do so. A lot of men (not all, but a lot) feel that they aren't as manly if their "woman" pays for the date, has a better paying job, drives a better car, etc. I will agree that a lot of the time, men are rewarded with praise when they do the things listed, like pull out the chair, hold the door open and let the woman through first, etc., but once again, this is more so due from pride. A lot of men are raised in an environment, more so with their fathers and mothers, that this is how you're supposed to treat a woman, because it's the manly thing to do, rather than to earn praise from women if they do it, or get scolded if they don't. Chivalry is an etiquette that is taught from man to man, not something that men do to get praised, even if that does happen. Once again, this is more along the lines of his male friends that do the name calling, rather than his wife or girlfriend. In this day and age, a lot of women (not all, but a lot) have begun to prefer having control over the house, paying the bills, having a job, and the husband staying at home. But it's the men that see this as laziness, as being a loser, as being less of a man when they find out their friends are staying at home, doing the cleaning, cooking, and driving the kids to school. This is something that I will agree to, because it does happen. Though I've never done this, because I'm not that much of a drama queen, most of my girl friends, along with even my mom and my sister, have done things like this to get what they want out of the relationship. They've called their boyfriends assholes for not doing what they wanted, or acting all surprised when they've found out they've been cheated on. But, at the same time, this is another reason why girls put themselves out there so much. Because they've learned at a young age that if they don't offer up sex right away, a lot of guys will just run to one that will put out. Once again, we're to the very first point at the beginning of the post. If women come off as easy, and throw themselves at men, they're branded as sluts and regarded as such. It just seems to be a very vicious cycle. At any rate, I would love to read the book, just to see what else is said in it. I'll try to look for it at the library, or maybe Borders.